It was quarter to three in the morning. I couldn't sleep. An overwhelming rush of unsettling thoughts were vying with each other to occupy my insanely complicated yet (or therefore) acutely obtuse consciousness. The room was too small for them. It was stifling their competitiveness. A walk along the corridor would do. Or I could roam about the hostel.
From the balcony I heard two security guards talking about ghosts outside a well. I was surprised it didn't scare me. I walked till the library and sat outside. But I was too restless to sit. It was then that I decided to explore the lonely-walk-at-three-in-the-morning part of IIT.
The last customers were leaving CCD. A solitary couple huddled at the solitary bus stop. A noisy couple quickly walked past in favor of a noisier location. And there, standing at GC, I beheld IIT laid bare, stripped of all humanity, except of course, if you want to get into the technicalities, the couple, the security guards and myself, and not to mention the dogs, walking royally nonchalantly along the roads like they owned them, of which I took little notice. The yellow and white lights from the street lamps shone down upon me through the dense foliage, alternating between cozy shadows. The half-moon showed itself intermittently, as if to say 'I'm shining down upon you too!' (like the moon shine was its own). The faint rustle of the drowsy leaves, the chirping of the early birds (do they work hard for the worm!), distant music from a guard's radio, my middle-of-the-road footsteps, an occasional roar of an airplane flying past - this was more or less all I could hear. Wonder if anyone can hear anything else at that time of the day.
But I'll remember this walk for what it was worth. It was one of those moments when you are totally at peace with yourself and your squealing thoughts. It was when I realized that nothing mattered - my grades, my app, my CAT (the dogs). Not that I could do much even if they did which was why it was such a relief to have such a relieving realization. And then I felt what I had been trying to feel for a long time. It felt like centuries of yearning had been redeemed by that moment's respite. My knees felt weak and my head, heavy. Mission Accomplished. I felt sleepy.
